Men are often told by their communities to suppress their emotions and keep silent about mental health struggle, which causes incredible harm. But the opposite can also be true: when a community works to promote mental health it opens the door for men to get the knowledge and support they need to look after themselves and the people around them.
Patrice Cammarano, New Brunswick Network Representative
“As a track athlete, it’s always struck me how the world of sports can encourage and promote toxic masculinity. You’re taught that your performance is the most important thing. You’re expected to keep pushing, even if you’re injured, even if you’re struggling. Medals, records, and wins are what matters. Not how you’re feeling, not if you’re hurting. It’s unrealistic and it’s unhealthy. And I’ve seen that culture hurt the mental health of so many of the young athletes who I’ve known and competed with because it makes speaking up about mental health concerns nearly impossible.
Talking about anything that affects performance is already incredibly challenging in sports circles. It can be seen as weakness. I look to coaches to help change that mentality. They’re mentors to young athletes and have a huge influence on them. Instead of enforcing unhealthy norms, they can be the people who help young men realize what struggle looks like, the importance of talking, and that taking care of your mental health is just as important as any other part of wellness. They can lead a shift in sports culture, where athletes can see that sport isn’t more important than health, and that taking a mental health day is as normal as taking time to heal an injury.
And on an athlete-to-athlete level, we need to talk to each other. Teammates or the people we see at practice can be the people we turn to when we’re struggling. Suicide is the second leading cause of death for young people in Canada, and men are three times more likely to die by suicide than women. We need to be brave enough to support one another. And we need to find the courage to speak up for ourselves and ask for the help we need. Athletes are applauded for taking care of their physical health. It’s high time we start doing the same for mental health.”
Ezechiel Nana, Quebec Network Representative
“Discussions about mental health can be intimidating at first, especially for young men. And when you come from a community where mental health isn’t talked about openly, it can be really challenging to start that conversation. Young men in particular can feel that they’ll be judged or laughed at for talking about their emotions. And that’s a huge problem because it prevents them from getting the support they need. We need to normalize conversations about mental health and move away from the idea that it’s noble to struggle in silence.
Young men need to see community leaders talk about mental health. They need to see that compassion for yourself and for the people around you is something to be celebrated. And they need to know that the people around them will have their back if they’re struggling with their mental health.
I’ve always looked to my spiritual community as a source of guidance when it comes to mental health. It’s there that I found leaders who were open and honest about mental health struggle. My pastor is very open about going to counselling sessions and knowing that made it easier for me to open up about my own mental health. Seeing someone I look up to speak out about mental health validated my own experiences and had a ripple effect throughout the whole community. It showed us that anyone can struggle with their mental health. The most important thing is to be open about it and to know that you have the support of your community behind you.”
Riley Wells, Jack Talks Speaker
“This month, our social media feeds transform into a platform for men’s mental health. We share posts, fundraisers, and campaigns that help shape the face of what it means to “be a man” in our society. We bring attention to how men are taught to repress their emotions, but suffer the consequences when their mental health deteriorates. And we push back against the unhealthy ideologies about masculinity that are the foundation of why it is so difficult for many men to reach out and have an honest conversation about their mental health.
But men's mental health deserves more attention than one month a year. Men are the least likely to seek mental health support, even though they are far more likely to die by suicide than any other gender. We need to talk about that year round if we’re going to make a difference. And, most importantly, we need to start talking to one another.
Men need to know that it's okay to be the one who receives support, even if we’re used to being the ones who provide it. And that means reaching out. Remember that mental health is a journey. There is no destination, just progress day by day. Men might prefer to talk shoulder-to-shoulder instead of face-to-face, so try checking in or reaching out while you play a video game, go for a drive, or catch the game. The important thing is that we start talking. There might be something important hiding behind that mustache.”
Quinn Richardson, Jack Talks Speaker
“Growing up in a rural area, mental health wasn’t really on my community’s radar. And many of the older guys I knew didn’t talk about emotions or the difficulties they were going through. I think many of them felt like they needed to conform to a version of masculinity where they don’t express emotion to fit in. That was mirrored with guys my own age — we didn’t talk about mental health or mental health resources. And if you were going through something, the mentality was very much to tough it out, even when that led to real harm.
I’ve seen that mentality shift a little bit as I’ve gotten older, but I still think we expect men to conform to certain modes of communication and expression in order to be accepted. Dressing unconventionally or listening to alternative music can be controversial because you’re pushing back against what people expect of you. But I’ve found that embracing those alternative parts of my identity has been incredible for my mental health. And I think that more men need to be able to embrace what makes them feel like their true selves in order to support their mental health.
So this month, let’s focus on having conversations and spreading awareness about men’s mental health. But let’s also make sure we think critically about what we expect of ourselves and the men around us. Masculinity shouldn’t flatten our identity or make us feel like we need to shed parts of ourselves that make us happy. It doesn't need to be radical, but small things that help us to embrace who we are as individuals make all the difference to our happiness in the long term. Men deserve to be accepted and supported for who they are. We all have a role in making that happen.”